C1.18 —-Crime Record
by UntamedSUnaware of You Xin’s unknown malice, You Xin remained oblivious, ‘her’ entire attention at the moment occupied by her beloved before her.
“!!!”
You Xin stared dumbfounded at the close proximity of Jiu Shu, frozen in place for a moment by the unexpected kiss.
By now evening had arrived and the sky was dark.
Inside the basement, the lights were on, the current was a little unstable, and the ambiguous atmosphere appeared between the bright and the dark.
Jiu Shu’s smile carried a bit of haze under the dim light, and his incredibly soft lips moved away from You Xin’s cheek.
The not-so-hot temperature was like a cluster of blazing embers, burning her face red, ‘her’ eyes opened wide, and all that was reflected in her pitch-black pupils was Jiu Shu.
A moment later, the circles of her eyes became slightly red, as if she was suppressing tears.
To You Xin, this was the kiss ‘she’ had dreamed of.
Ever since the last farewell kiss, You Xin had dreamt, she didn’t know how many times, that the nightmare had resurfaced, and that it was not she who was being kissed by her beloved, but her brother.
And he had asked for it himself.
There was nothing more desperate than that.
That sense of despair washed over and over again over ‘her’ already fragile nerves, causing ‘her’ repressed spirit to become unstable, and the complex emotions of jealousy, resentment, and grudge intertwined together almost drove ‘her ‘ crazy.
And now, at last, You Xin had been given the same kiss.
Her nightmare was over.
There was no greater happiness in the world than a beloved speaking words of love and also sending kisses.
‘She’ looked at Jiu Shu with bright eyes, so happy that she even wished for time to freeze so that they could remain happy.
Jiu Shu looked at the tall man sitting on a low chair, touched to the point where he seemed to be on the verge of crying hints of laughter flooded his beautiful dark pupils.
“Are you about to cry because you don’t want me to kiss you?”
Jiu Shu snapped in a feigned troubled voice, then smirked at her flustered expression as You Xin stammered out a denial, “No, no! I love ……”
Fearful of being misunderstood by her beloved, You Xin’s tongue knotted with excitement.
Looking at the tall man’s face full of aggression and at a loss for words, Jiu Shu suddenly burst out laughing.
He enjoyed teasing You Xin, after all, this amusing object of discipline obviously possessed a tall and strong body, yet his face always wore an innocence that didn’t match it at all.
It always made one want to tease this fun sub-personality.
Still, teasing had to be done in moderation, and Jiu Shu knew the right amount.
So he reached out and rubbed the slightly hard-haired head in front of him, “Okay, I’m teasing you, let’s get on with the game!”
“Okay, okay!”
You Xin was instantly soothed, ‘she’ nodded obediently, not caring even though she was flustered by his teasing, her reddened ears revealed the shyness of her heart at this time.
She even hoped that Jiu Shu could rub her head again, that kind of doting demeanor, giving a feeling of being deeply loved by Jiu Shu, made You Xin incomparably infatuated.
[……] The always cold-eyed You Xin watched all of this, his eyes swept over Jiu Shu’s long, white palms as if unintentionally, and he seemed to be a bit dazed.
He also remembered that gentle embrace and gentle rubbing of his head, which indeed revealed the youth’s pampering, and would even give one the illusion of being loved.
But this kind of pet-like pampering probably wouldn’t last long.
You Xin retracted his gaze in silence, guessing that perhaps after a month, the youth who would be tired of playing with him would abandon You Xin; after all, no one would love a man who was ugly and unattractive.
Inside the basement, seeing that You Xin was already red and on the verge of bursting, Jiu Shu stopped joking and sat back in his seat, grinning and resting his cheeks as he placed two stacks of cards on the table for You Xin to draw from.
The basement wasn’t small, after all, it was the theater’s original storage for piling up props and sundries, so there was plenty of space, enough for them to sit on either side of the table.
The cards were placed in the center of the table.
To You Xin, it was a distance that could be described as far away, and ‘she’ watched with a slight loss as her beloved sat back down, blushing as she met the youth’s peach blossom eyes that were so beautiful that they seemed to see through everything.
Not daring to lock eyes with Jiu Shu again, with shyly drooping eyes, You Xin casually drew out a card, looked at the words on the card, and read out, “I am a …… monster.”
You Xin’s pupils widened slightly as ‘she’ looked at the card in her hand.
In the shadow of the light, the man’s pale, bloodless bones tightened violently, as if hesitating for something.
Eventually, the deck was placed in his right hand.
When he withdrew his hand, his fingertips tightened to the point of whiteness.
‘She’ didn’t dare to look up, afraid to see the strangeness and rejection that showed on Jiu Shu’s face.
Afraid of what would happen if her true identity was revealed.
“…… This deck of cards seems old, it might be an antique.” Jiu Shu looked at the head hanging down to see You Xin’s expression, but his tone remained normal.
This kind of small game between couples would always engage in some role-playing love affairs, such as doctors and patients, princes and princesses, and so on, as for the identity of monsters and the like, it was rather like a game from the last century.
Jiu Shu was actually a bit surprised by the contents of the deck, it fit in a bit too well.
But looking at the way You Xin’s fingers trembled slightly as he placed the deck to his right hand, his eyes seemed to soften a bit.
Then he picked out a card from his own stack.
“My lover is a monster.” With that said, Jiu Shu placed the card to his right hand.
The implication was that it was true.
With a few moments of bewilderment, You Xin raised her head, and her eyes, which had been repressing certain dark emotions, immediately regained their vigor, gleaming in the light.
It was as if the entire world lit up in ‘her’ eyes.
Jiu Shu’s slender white fingers rested on his cheeks as he watched You Xin’s richly changing expression, and the narrow tails of his eyes couldn’t help but glow with a confusingly luscious color as he smiled softly.
Enchanted by the smile, You Xin’s smile became silly, as if the trepidation she had just felt was completely non-existent.
‘She’ was easily satisfied, and even though it was only a card game, it was as if she had been recognized by her beloved, she was so happy that she almost swooned.
There was actually another card in Jiu Shu’s pile of cards that was I hate monsters, but looking at the way You Xin was on the verge of tears, he decided not to tease him.
“Your turn again.”
Already a little afraid of drawing cards, ‘she’ hesitated for a moment, but couldn’t bear his expectant gaze and drew a card.
The card was normal this time, and with total relief, You Xin read it out, “My lover is an angel.”
You Xin’s voice was male-specific magnetic, with a deep and melodious voice that conveyed romantic sentences with a touch of intoxicating affection.
Jiu Shu blinked, not denying that his heart skipped a bit , realizing for the first time that he seemed to be a bit voice-controlled.
This deck was indeed very old, it was all about some corny role-playing.
But it was certainly interesting.
Jiu Shu lowered his eyes with a smile and casually drew a card as well.
This kind of couple’s game was very casual, one could draw blindly or with a purpose, and Jiu Shu thought that drawing blindly would be fun.
But he didn’t expect it to be so interesting.
Looking at the text on the card in his hand, Jiu Shu thought so.
“The body of my beloved fascinates me.”
This seemed to be a small yellow card that specialized in building emotions.
Jiu Shu put the card to his right hand, and it was true.
The body of the object of discipline was indeed attractive.
“……!!!”
You Xin’s temperature instantly rose back up, ‘her’ face was red to the point of almost dripping blood.
“I… I… Thank you ……” You Xin didn’t know what to say, her brain went blank as ‘she’ looked at the smiling face of her beloved, at a loss for words.
[……] It was nothing more than a falsehood between lovers.
While thinking so, You Xin felt the temperature of his face getting hotter and hotter, unable to tell if it was his or his sister’s.
Shyly, You Xin met Jiu Shu’s unobtrusive gaze, and even though he tried to suppress it, his dark pupils were filled with happiness.
This was the first time that Jiu Shu had said why he liked You Xin, and even though it only came from the cards, it caused You Xin, who had always harbored uneasiness in her heart, to feel a joy that was hard to restrain.
‘She’ didn’t know why he would fall in love with ‘her’, a man who was incomparably ugly in the eyes of outsiders, and didn’t dare to inquire for fear that this dreamlike and beautiful romance would be shattered.
For he had never found anything attractive in himself.
All along, You Xin had harbored a deep loathing for this body, and as a self-identified female, this ugly body sickened him.
But if this body was the reason Jiu Shu liked him, then he could live with it forever.
For the first time, You Xin recognized his true gender.
Just …… if only the consciousness of this body was only his own, then Jiu Shu’s love would be his forever.
‘She’ thought so as she sheepishly withdrew her gaze from Jiu Shu.
TN:
I might not update tomorrow, cause it’s a special day to me, so see you next tomorrow ✌️
Thanks for updating 🙂
Ohhhhh, I kinda get it…. I love these two You Xin its like the yuri-yaoi couple meme, I think this is a bit of a struggle cause his sister was loved so You Xin is jealous of that, and also stems from mother, sister and girls and women being more loved? But also I really do feel bad for everyone else who has experienced body and gender dysmorphia I feel you peeps, I’m lucky that my country’s laguage doesn’t have ‘she’ or ‘he’ only referring to ‘that girl’ or ‘that boy’ but most common use is ‘that person’ and Im androgynous so i can pass for both
As someone who’s agender, I’ve personally experienced how influential external acceptance (or lack thereof) can be on your own self-acceptance. So even if the true gender line is a bit uncomfortably-worded, it still makes sense to me that a yandere split personality born out of self-loathing and yearning for love would have it much easier to adopt a new gender.
Plus I doubt that said yandere split personality really gives a shit about gender norms anyway lol